Thursday, February 25, 2010

Sandwich Ring Guilt

We've all been there. You're sick and you don't feel well and for once, you've decided to be an adult about it. You are not going to imagine that the world will go into a holding pattern if you don't show up for work. You're actually going to stay in bed, get your rest, drink your fluids, and get better.

And then you remember. There's a meeting today. And not just any meeting. A meeting which involves clients. And sandwich rings. And while you're pretty sure that the clients would understand and would be happier to reschedule than be exposed to your germy germs, you're pretty sure the caterers won't care.

The caterers have ordered lunch meat and baked bread and prepared "prepared salads" in anticipation of fulfilling your sandwich ring catering order. And sure, you can cancel, but you're inside the 24 hour notice, so they're going to charge you anyways. And sure, the employees who would eat the sandwich ring would be appreciative of your noble sacrifice on their behalf, but there's one minor detail that foils your plans.


Accounting will be pissed that they had to pay for two sandwich rings because you were "too sick" to come to work for a sandwich ring meeting and they had to pay for another one for the day the meeting was rescheduled to. Accounting doesn't care if you are "bleeding out your eyeballs" and are likely to spread the plague with your every footfall.

Accounting is concerned with P&L, COGS, TPS, and all sorts of other acronyms that you learn while getting a BA in Accounting. (I wonder if they abbreviate Accounting on your degree just to give you one more acronym in the club of acronyms?)

And so here I sit. Because of the sandwich ring. I'm not even going to eat the sandwich ring because of the cholesterol involved. (The cholesterol balance sheet is a post for another day). I hope accounting enjoys my contribution to their acronyms.

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